What To Do When You Have No Idea What You Are Doing

There are so many moments during my journey as a mum that I’ve thought to myself ‘I have no idea what I am doing’. And it’s true, none of us do! Every day, we are learning new things about the little people we are caring for, and as they grow and change, we’ll be faced with new situations that we’ve never faced before: ranging from crying babies through to toilet training, questions from preschoolers and challenges to your authority from every age!

So, what do you do when you have no idea what to do? Often I utter a quick prayer for wisdom, but one strategy that works really well for me is to make it into a song. Stay with me here, this idea sounds ludicrous, but you might find that it works if you give it a try!

What happens when you sing about it?

Think about it: how do you feel when you don’t know what you’re doing? Often something has happened to make you frustrated or stressed out, and your emotions are running high! Making up a song to explain how you are feeling changes your ‘state’ because instead of expressing the stress, you are using creativity and fun.

Have a think about it: imagine singing to your baby (make up your own tune!):

‘Oh, I have no idea why you are crying, and I wish that you could tell me;

I want to help you because I love you, I love you so much;

I will cuddle you and hold you and try to make it better;

You can help me by not crying anymore.’

And what does it do for your child? Suddenly instead of hearing frustration and stress, they are hearing a tune and loving words coming from you… and they are often so surprised that they calm down enough to hear what you are singing about!

Another example:

‘What do you want on your toast today?

Jam or vegemite, tell me your choice?

Otherwise I’ll choose for you, and you’ll just have to eat it.

Jam or vegemiiiiiiiite?!???! What will you choose?’

Don't know what to do

Once your children get older, they get more embarrassed at their mum breaking into song at school or at the shops, so it’s a good deterrent for bad behaviour as well! (I used this one recently when my youngest didn’t want me to leave him at school. His classmates were amused as I sang him an operatic goodbye song!)

It helps you, it helps them, and I can’t tell you how amazing it is the day your children respond to your song by singing another one back to you… your house turns into a musical, complete with choreography. Sounds like fun, doesn’t it?!

Try it out! I’d love to hear what songs you made up today!

About The Author


Tanya lives in Canberra with her husband and two sons. She is passionate about helping women to live fulfilled, purposeful lives. She enjoys reading, cooking, craft and creating memorable moments for her family.

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